Archive for Lamekers


Posted in Par-day Har-day with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 11, 2010 by ali

No homo.

I said it before and I’ll say it again. When the Gaykers lose their overly aggressive fans get real SILENT. I enjoy the silence don’t get me wrong, but I like the sound of the fair-weather fans with no noise coming out of their dropped jaws. As Mike would say, “Sorry son!” Haha…he’ll be pissed I used his quote on his own team. Bad girl. Good game. (Insert ass-slap here.)



Posted in Shitty vs Stellar with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 7, 2010 by ali

Yep!! I’m talking to you Gaykers!! I guess Lamar’s cockiness last night was the team’s demise. Cockiness is next to douchiness. Isn’t that how the saying goes? Don’t worry Lamekers you are not alone. One of my all time favorite porky pig’s to “hate on” Mariah Skanky gave an AWESOME drunk ass speech at the Palm Springs International Film Festival (you’re not alone, I’ve never heard of it either). Why was she there? No idea. She sucks. But what doesn’t suck is her speech. In my book (also known as the Torali) it’s the best performance I have ever seen from her. Now let’s all thank the podium for shielding what is hiding behind it…her size 10 body squeezed into a size zero dress.


Posted in Shitty vs Stellar with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 14, 2009 by ali


Not you 76ers. You sucked tonight. WHOO HOOO to the Nugget’s!! Shit was AMAZING! Really, I must have burned about 1,000 calories during the game. Catch a highlight. When newbie Ty Lawson put it down on Mbenga? Haha…sorry son! And listen here J.R. Smith you delinquent hottie, nobody is going to call you Earl. I am glad you turned over the preverbal “new leaf” while in jail (which is crazy BS) but let’s be honest Earl. It ain’t gonna happen. Although, the 20 points (in 23 minutes) he dropped on the Lamekers made me want to call “Earl” whatever he wants me too. Preferably daddy. The 76ers could take some lessons from the Nuggs. Especially Elton (I can’t stand you) Brand. 11 points? Really? How much are you getting paid? Trust it’s enough to crush the Mormon Jazz and lame ass Boozer. Disgusted yet, elated…I believe they call it “bitter sweet.”

Best part of the whole game…

Posted in Testies testies, one, two... with tags , , , , , , , on June 12, 2009 by ali

Lucky for you I didn’t pay any attention to the game tonight. Instead, I focused my small attention span on the fans. The only way I could figure out how to show you this stellar moment I noticed during the game tonight was to record it on my camera so I apologize for the poor quality, but not for the amazing commentary. (Shout out to my DVR! Yeah son.) Please follow along as one of the classy audience participants of tonight’s festivities proceeds to eat shit without her friends even caring. Wow…I made this drunk moment almost sound legit. You’re welcome whoever you are you drunkity drunk bottle blond! I hope you have aspirin for that ass ache tomorrow!

“Laker fans are like Raider fans, ughhh.” Erin

Posted in The Answer with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 5, 2009 by ali

Mickael Pietrus averaged 9.4 points a game for the 2008-09 season. Post season, Mickael Pietrus has scored 10.7 on average. I just wanted to clear up his stats before the Lameker loving “Raider Fans” go crazy and say…maybe Pietrus would have done better if he didn’t switch the shoes!! Shows what you closet queens know. Tonight even though the Magic got bent over (insert Gaykers being gay comment here) Mickael Pietrus scored 14. And do you know who he has to thank? Michael Jordan. The best player…and playa to date.

PS- Thank you ESPN for being my information whore. 

Ummm….GO CAVS??

Posted in Shitty vs Stellar with tags , , , , , , on May 30, 2009 by ali

I miss you sexy Nuggets already. Oh and Billy Goat Bryant? That “head nuzzle” thing you were doing in towards the end of the 4th? Very gay.



Happy day indeed!

Posted in Shitty vs Stellar with tags , , , , , , , on May 11, 2009 by ali

I got the best present for mothers day and I’m sure you all know what it is so I wont get into the bitch slap the Gaykers got today…but thank you Lamekers. That was very nice of you. Keep up the good work. Also equally as stellar was the Celtics win over the Orlando Magic. A total nail bitter until “Big Baby” Davis hit that game winner. If you missed it PLEASE watch the clip. There is a little present for you at :59. Note the “smaller” Magic fan that gets checked. The gifts just keep coming.