Happy Thanksgiving!

I hope you all have a great Thanksgiving. I mean, since you need to set aside one particular day to be thankful and all…

The end of an era.

I don’t even know what to say except pass me the tissues…and the Seagram’s. This is from Stephen A. Smith’s website. No relation to J.R. aka Earl…

TO ALL OF MY FANS:

I would like to announce my plans to retire from the National Basketball Association. I always thought that when I left the game, it would be because I couldn’t help my team the way that I was accustomed to. However, that is not the case. I still have tremendous love for the game, the desire to play, and a whole lot left in my tank. I feel strongly that I can still compete at the highest level. Stepping away from the game will allow me to spend quality time with my wife and kids. This is a reward that far exceeds anything that I’ve ever achieved on the basketball court. I have prayed for this day and I see it as my greatest gift. I want to thank the people of Reebok International Ltd., for always allowing me to be me and for supporting me my whole career through all the ups and downs. I have enjoyed 13 wonderful seasons in the NBA, and I am grateful. I want to first acknowledge my fans everywhere, who have been with me throughout my entire career. Without you, there would be no me. You should all know that I appreciate your support from the bottom of my heart. Thank you! To Michael Jordan, Magic Johnson, Isiah Thomas, Charles Barkley and Larry Bird, you guys gave me the vision to play the game that will be forever in my heart. To my Mom, who encouraged and inspired me to play every day, and to all of my family and friends who stood by me from the beginning. Thank you! To my high school coach, Michael Bailey, Coach John Thompson at Georgetown University, Coach Larry Brown and to all of my other coaches, teammates, administrators, owners and staff who’ve been a part of my career, Thank you as well! I’d like to give a special thanks to the people of Memphis. I never played a home game for your beloved Grizzlies, but I want you to know how much I appreciate the opportunity given me by a great owner in Michael Heisley, and the support of the city. I wish the Memphis Grizzlies’ organization all of the success that the game has to offer. And finally, to the city of Philadelphia: I have wonderful memories of my days in a Sixers’ uniform. To Philly fans, thank you. Your voice will always be music to my ears.

God Bless all of you, ALLEN IVERSON

PS- Whoever Ali is I just want her to know she can call me anytime for a late night boot knocking session. “You bring the woodpecker I’ll bring the wood,” LL Cool J.

OK, I might have added the PS part. This is a very sad day for what seems like a “life long” A.I. fan. The bad news is basketball will never be the same again for me. I knew this day would come someday but I hoped it would come in Philly. I guess the preverbal “light at the end of the tunnel” is Allen Iverson will remain looking fine as wine. And in case you were unaware, wine is apparently fine. Hopefully next year his wife and kids will be driving him up the walls and he will pull a Jordan and make a final run in the NBA. Hopefully in a 76ers uniform. I miss you already Allen. 

It's ok to come back...I mean Favre did it. Please??

#1 reason it’s good to have “junk in the trunk.”

I know I have been lagging…not for lack of things to say but I guess more-so lack of motivation. I’ve been working on somethings for school/work but no excuses. I straight up lag right now. Last night we didn’t watch the American Music Awards because something WAY more important was on…Dexter. It was the best one yet for real so if you aren’t watching “Dex,” (as I like to call it) you are a crack head. I mean you must be weighing out the options, crack or Dexter?? You’re making the wrong choice. Capeesh? Any who, I saw some highlights of the AMA’s from last night and all I can say is, really?? I don’t know this Adam Lambert (no relation to Stephanie) guy is but I did see the video where he FULLY macked down his keyboard player and simulated a little “bump and grind” session and that NBC censored it. That is total bullshit. How many damn times to I have to see two girls kiss on TV? Chicks rub themselves all over, lick their fingers in a “I want to do this to your member” type of way, and even make out with one another. Now it’s two guys and what? I can’t see that? There is some imaginary line that NBC refuses to cross and that we as AMERICANS have to be unwillingly censored? Come on, there is a bitch wearing a bikini in every advertisement from burgers to cars, I mean every reality show consists of ho’s in a hot tub so why not let the guys have their fun?  It would seem to be NBC thinks lesbians are ok in a “pushing the envelope” kind of way buy not gays dudes are no bueno? What is wrong with people?? I’m actually out of words. I don’t get it. You know, let’s just get into the shit that NBC did in fact show at the AMA’s…look’s like I am happy I didn’t watch it.

PS- “Dick Clark Productions” keeps pulling this video (sounds like somebody is a little “ass sore” over the video) so if it has been removed I suggest you try to find it. I never saw a J-Lo budget bootie bounce quite like that…. or wear a bedazzled “granny panty” inspired pair of shorts. 

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Thank you for running my day ESPN…Memphis announced Monday that the team has ended its one-year contract with the 10-time All-Star and former league MVP in what it called a mutual agreement. Iverson was not placed on waivers by the 6 p.m. ET deadline on Monday so is expected to be waived on Tuesday. “Because of personal matters that forced him to leave the team on November 7, Allen will step away from the game at this time, allowing him to focus on those matters,” general manager Chris Wallace said in a statement. “As a result, we will be ending our contractual agreement with Allen, which will allow both parties to move forward. We wish Allen the best.”

I of course also wish him the best…and wish he’d get his pretty head out of his perfect ass and play some b-ball!! I guess it could go two ways at this point. He either retires or some other team takes a chance on the new (yet old) “bad boy” of basketball. I had always hoped Philly would be the end point for him and his accomplished career but, that ain’t gonna happen. Either way, A.I. will always be my favorite player of all times and will no doubt be the finest man I have ever seen in my life. Forever ever? Yes. 

Wow. I can see why “we” are chosen.

Seriously?? All I really want to know is where do they get the “holy water” refills and who pays for those dispensers? That collection plate scam must be really paying off.

 

 

WELL DONE!!

Not you 76ers. You sucked tonight. WHOO HOOO to the Nugget’s!! Shit was AMAZING! Really, I must have burned about 1,000 calories during the game. Catch a highlight. When newbie Ty Lawson put it down on Mbenga? Haha…sorry son! And listen here J.R. Smith you delinquent hottie, nobody is going to call you Earl. I am glad you turned over the preverbal “new leaf” while in jail (which is crazy BS) but let’s be honest Earl. It ain’t gonna happen. Although, the 20 points (in 23 minutes) he dropped on the Lamekers made me want to call “Earl” whatever he wants me too. Preferably daddy. The 76ers could take some lessons from the Nuggs. Especially Elton (I can’t stand you) Brand. 11 points? Really? How much are you getting paid? Trust it’s enough to crush the Mormon Jazz and lame ass Boozer. Disgusted yet, elated…I believe they call it “bitter sweet.”

Being named coach of the year = kiss of death

I was just saying last night while watching the Suns DESTROY the Hornets that Byron Scott must be shaking in his loafers. NEWS FLASH: The New Orleans Hornets have fired coach Byron Scott. Wooow. I mean, not only was he named coach of the year in 2008, but also they are only eight games in!! Do the names Avery Johnson or Mike D’Antoni ring a bell?  Being named coach of the year in the NBA might be an honor, but it seems like it will instantly seal your fate. Especially if heaven forbid YOUR TEAM can’t pull off eight wins in a row. Byron, I know how you feel. I didn’t get fired but being laid off kinda feels like you’ve been fired. For that feeling, I’m sorry for you. Although, your severance was no doubt bigger than mine. Damn, jump the gun much NBA?

THANK YOU VETERANS!!

Seriously...thank you.

“Michael Vick? That’s my dog!” -Mike

Words from an angel’s mouth aka Mike. Shameful…haha. Well another exciting Sunday filled with football (and Dexter) is behind me…thankfully. (Well, not the Dexter part!) I noticed today that the football hand signal for “false start” is the same as the hand signal for “traveling” in basketball. You’d think that the NFL could come up their own original hand gestures. I don’t blame them I guess…people always want to copy cool things. Not that you care (I do, so suffer through it), but here is what I learned today about, “The Answer is how to look fine at 34 Alex.”

I miss you again!!! DAMN YOU IVERSON!!

Head coach Lionel Hollins said Saturday night that Iverson’s departure was “indefinite.” Owner Michael Heisley said Iverson’s absence has nothing to do with his displeasure about his role on the team.
“I’m not going to get into the personal reason but it has nothing to do with the other stuff,” Heisley told the Commercial Appeal, referring to Iverson’s unhappiness over his sixth man role. “I’m the guy who said he could go. It’s a real family issue that I don’t think should be reported.” “I flew out there to try and calm things down,” Heisley said. “I don’t feel good about losing and that there’s a lot going on in the media. But we need Allen. “He has to make some adjustments. This is something we knew we’d have to address. But Allen leaving has nothing to do with a penalty or Allen being (annoyed). There’s no another agenda.” (Source: ESPN/ COMMERCIAL APPEAL) 

I don’t know what the hell is going on with Iverson but it sounds serious. Just in case it is serious, I would like to pass on the “blessing” that the Mormons offered me in the parking lot today at Ralph’s. Awww, how sweet am I? I sooo deserve to win the lotto now right? 

Fresh from ESPN…WTF?

Allen Iverson was granted permission to leave the Memphis Grizzlies to deal with a personal matter, the Memphis Commercial Appeal reported on Saturday. Iverson had a meeting with Grizzlies owner Michael Heisley Friday night after the team lost 114-98 to the Los Angeles Lakers, the newspaper reported. Iverson met with Heisley again Saturday morning and then left for Atlanta, the Commercial Appeal reported. Iverson lives in Atlanta during the off-season.

What do they mean it’s “not known if he will return?” What the hell? Sooo bummed because I was looking forward to seeing his mug tonight against the Clipps. Thought I’d maybe be talking a little smack with Ernie who is the only Clippers fan I know. Not to mention the A.I. withdrawals I had during the off-season. Of course this will be a perfect time for all of the haters to come out and talk their smack about Allen. That aside (and screw you haters), I really hope that the “personal matter” isn’t that something is wrong with his family except maybe his…haha simmer down, I am only kidding. I’ll be investigating to see if I can find out what really happened to make him leave. Instant Saturday night plans. Shiiiit, I don’t want to sit here and watch the Nugget’s get WAXED for the second night in a row. Again the final score might not stress the beating they are receiving. Who knows at this point? But trust me, it ain’t nothing nice. Double WTF.